Thank you to SSBJღ for sponsoring my baby's memorial, and to Angel of Flowers for the artwork. It means the world
🩵🩵
~~~~
Not everyone considers a miscarriage to be the loss of a child, but for my long-time boyfriend and I, it was. And it was the only child I would ever have the chance of giving birth to. But for some reason that only god knows why, it was not meant to be….
I had a miscarriage on February 24th 2009, approx. 6 weeks into my pregnancy. I was 18 years old, and not aware that I was pregnant nor had I been planning on getting pregnant. Being young and having never been pregnant before, I was not familiar with any early warning signs, and my menstrual cycles have always been irregular, so I chalked up a missed period to hormones.
For some women, when finding out they are pregnant, it is a joyful occasion. But for others, they find out during some of the most heartbreaking moments of their lives. So while I'll spare the details of my ordeal, I think it's needless to say that the latter was the case for me.
I will always wonder "what if"….
I wonder who you would be today my sweet baby. I always had the feeling you would have been a boy, I don't know why, I just have. And your name came to me straight away…my precious baby Aiden Alexander (presumed male, though at six weeks it is obviously too early to know). I just wish things could have turned out different. His father and I were devastated when we found out that the health problems I had which most likely caused me to miscarry, is what has made me permanently infertile and left us unable to ever have children. This baby was our only chance, and now we will never know… I think that is what hurts the most.
There's a thing about invisible moms. Being an "invisible mom" is hard, because people don't know that you are a mother, since your baby is not physically here with you; whether it was due to miscarriage, stillbirth, death within hours or days of being born, etc…
That can make some days, like Mother's Day, an extremely difficult and painful day. And likewise, Father's Day can be difficult for an invisible dad. It was hard for us. It still hurts.
But each of those babies that never got to live a life here on earth still has a soul. They were angels too beautiful for earth. And we are still their mothers. We carried them in our bodies—whether it was for 6 weeks, 6 months, or to term…they were, are and always will be a part of us. God willing, may we all one day finally be reunited with them in the hereafter. And to my precious Aiden, I pray that one day after your daddy and I have left this world we will finally meet you our sweet child, the one we so longed to love, care for, nurture and to hold onto.
So to all the other "invisible parents" out there… know that you are not alone. Your babies are with you all the time. Just because you cannot hold them in your arms, does not mean you don't carry them in your heart.
-m.k.
~
Aiden Alexander
February 24th, 2009
"Not a day goes by that I don't think of you."
~~~~~~~~
🩵🩵
~~~~
Not everyone considers a miscarriage to be the loss of a child, but for my long-time boyfriend and I, it was. And it was the only child I would ever have the chance of giving birth to. But for some reason that only god knows why, it was not meant to be….
I had a miscarriage on February 24th 2009, approx. 6 weeks into my pregnancy. I was 18 years old, and not aware that I was pregnant nor had I been planning on getting pregnant. Being young and having never been pregnant before, I was not familiar with any early warning signs, and my menstrual cycles have always been irregular, so I chalked up a missed period to hormones.
For some women, when finding out they are pregnant, it is a joyful occasion. But for others, they find out during some of the most heartbreaking moments of their lives. So while I'll spare the details of my ordeal, I think it's needless to say that the latter was the case for me.
I will always wonder "what if"….
I wonder who you would be today my sweet baby. I always had the feeling you would have been a boy, I don't know why, I just have. And your name came to me straight away…my precious baby Aiden Alexander (presumed male, though at six weeks it is obviously too early to know). I just wish things could have turned out different. His father and I were devastated when we found out that the health problems I had which most likely caused me to miscarry, is what has made me permanently infertile and left us unable to ever have children. This baby was our only chance, and now we will never know… I think that is what hurts the most.
There's a thing about invisible moms. Being an "invisible mom" is hard, because people don't know that you are a mother, since your baby is not physically here with you; whether it was due to miscarriage, stillbirth, death within hours or days of being born, etc…
That can make some days, like Mother's Day, an extremely difficult and painful day. And likewise, Father's Day can be difficult for an invisible dad. It was hard for us. It still hurts.
But each of those babies that never got to live a life here on earth still has a soul. They were angels too beautiful for earth. And we are still their mothers. We carried them in our bodies—whether it was for 6 weeks, 6 months, or to term…they were, are and always will be a part of us. God willing, may we all one day finally be reunited with them in the hereafter. And to my precious Aiden, I pray that one day after your daddy and I have left this world we will finally meet you our sweet child, the one we so longed to love, care for, nurture and to hold onto.
So to all the other "invisible parents" out there… know that you are not alone. Your babies are with you all the time. Just because you cannot hold them in your arms, does not mean you don't carry them in your heart.
-m.k.
~
Aiden Alexander
February 24th, 2009
"Not a day goes by that I don't think of you."
~~~~~~~~
Thank you to SSBJღ for sponsoring my baby's memorial, and to Angel of Flowers for the artwork. It means the world
🩵🩵
~~~~
Not everyone considers a miscarriage to be the loss of a child, but for my long-time boyfriend and I, it was. And it was the only child I would ever have the chance of giving birth to. But for some reason that only god knows why, it was not meant to be….
I had a miscarriage on February 24th 2009, approx. 6 weeks into my pregnancy. I was 18 years old, and not aware that I was pregnant nor had I been planning on getting pregnant. Being young and having never been pregnant before, I was not familiar with any early warning signs, and my menstrual cycles have always been irregular, so I chalked up a missed period to hormones.
For some women, when finding out they are pregnant, it is a joyful occasion. But for others, they find out during some of the most heartbreaking moments of their lives. So while I'll spare the details of my ordeal, I think it's needless to say that the latter was the case for me.
I will always wonder "what if"….
I wonder who you would be today my sweet baby. I always had the feeling you would have been a boy, I don't know why, I just have. And your name came to me straight away…my precious baby Aiden Alexander (presumed male, though at six weeks it is obviously too early to know). I just wish things could have turned out different. His father and I were devastated when we found out that the health problems I had which most likely caused me to miscarry, is what has made me permanently infertile and left us unable to ever have children. This baby was our only chance, and now we will never know… I think that is what hurts the most.
There's a thing about invisible moms. Being an "invisible mom" is hard, because people don't know that you are a mother, since your baby is not physically here with you; whether it was due to miscarriage, stillbirth, death within hours or days of being born, etc…
That can make some days, like Mother's Day, an extremely difficult and painful day. And likewise, Father's Day can be difficult for an invisible dad. It was hard for us. It still hurts.
But each of those babies that never got to live a life here on earth still has a soul. They were angels too beautiful for earth. And we are still their mothers. We carried them in our bodies—whether it was for 6 weeks, 6 months, or to term…they were, are and always will be a part of us. God willing, may we all one day finally be reunited with them in the hereafter. And to my precious Aiden, I pray that one day after your daddy and I have left this world we will finally meet you our sweet child, the one we so longed to love, care for, nurture and to hold onto.
So to all the other "invisible parents" out there… know that you are not alone. Your babies are with you all the time. Just because you cannot hold them in your arms, does not mean you don't carry them in your heart.
-m.k.
~
Aiden Alexander
February 24th, 2009
"Not a day goes by that I don't think of you."
~~~~~~~~
🩵🩵
~~~~
Not everyone considers a miscarriage to be the loss of a child, but for my long-time boyfriend and I, it was. And it was the only child I would ever have the chance of giving birth to. But for some reason that only god knows why, it was not meant to be….
I had a miscarriage on February 24th 2009, approx. 6 weeks into my pregnancy. I was 18 years old, and not aware that I was pregnant nor had I been planning on getting pregnant. Being young and having never been pregnant before, I was not familiar with any early warning signs, and my menstrual cycles have always been irregular, so I chalked up a missed period to hormones.
For some women, when finding out they are pregnant, it is a joyful occasion. But for others, they find out during some of the most heartbreaking moments of their lives. So while I'll spare the details of my ordeal, I think it's needless to say that the latter was the case for me.
I will always wonder "what if"….
I wonder who you would be today my sweet baby. I always had the feeling you would have been a boy, I don't know why, I just have. And your name came to me straight away…my precious baby Aiden Alexander (presumed male, though at six weeks it is obviously too early to know). I just wish things could have turned out different. His father and I were devastated when we found out that the health problems I had which most likely caused me to miscarry, is what has made me permanently infertile and left us unable to ever have children. This baby was our only chance, and now we will never know… I think that is what hurts the most.
There's a thing about invisible moms. Being an "invisible mom" is hard, because people don't know that you are a mother, since your baby is not physically here with you; whether it was due to miscarriage, stillbirth, death within hours or days of being born, etc…
That can make some days, like Mother's Day, an extremely difficult and painful day. And likewise, Father's Day can be difficult for an invisible dad. It was hard for us. It still hurts.
But each of those babies that never got to live a life here on earth still has a soul. They were angels too beautiful for earth. And we are still their mothers. We carried them in our bodies—whether it was for 6 weeks, 6 months, or to term…they were, are and always will be a part of us. God willing, may we all one day finally be reunited with them in the hereafter. And to my precious Aiden, I pray that one day after your daddy and I have left this world we will finally meet you our sweet child, the one we so longed to love, care for, nurture and to hold onto.
So to all the other "invisible parents" out there… know that you are not alone. Your babies are with you all the time. Just because you cannot hold them in your arms, does not mean you don't carry them in your heart.
-m.k.
~
Aiden Alexander
February 24th, 2009
"Not a day goes by that I don't think of you."
~~~~~~~~
